Bye Week #1

The Aftermath

Julius Thomas and Chris Clark delivered as promised while Peyton Manning delivered as promised usual.

Wesley Woodyard hasn’t practiced all week with a neck injury Fox swears is not significant.  Ayers hasn’t practiced all week with a shoulder injury Fox swears is not significant.  Chris Harris got into some limited work Thursday with a concussion Fox swears is not significant.

…fortunate timing for the Broncos to hit their first of two Bye weeks.

Still, the defense got beat up last week.


Romo scrambled through arm tackles of the pass-rush and routinely hit receivers to move the chains against nearly impossible odds.  Defensive backs were regularly in position to make a play on the ball and were simply out-executed by Cowboy receivers and tight ends.

Is the Defense Secretly Terrible?

Not even close.  Here’s a beaten-up by nagging injury and suspensions unit that is hungry to come out swinging and show the world they can stop someone.  And as we saw earlier in the season, they can.

At will.

Here’s some blurry-as-shit sample screen shots from a play I totally cherry-picked to support my point of how close the defense was routinely and there’s nothing you can do to refute it because I don’t even check my comments section:

^ early big 3rd and 10, pocket crushed and multiple Broncos close on Romo

^ Bronco fans breathe a sigh of relief as this drive is about to come to a close

^ despite the ridiculous pressure, first sack eluded

^ now Wolfe can’t bring him down for a second sack eluded

^ here’s Romo staring down the shot from the 3rd Bronco to make contact with him and delivering a ridiculous 3rd down strike.

Champ is a first-ballot Hall of Famer because he MAKES those plays.  Von is one of the best current defenders in football because he MAKES those plays (Assuming he wasn’t avoiding drug tests because of PEDs).


Wesley, Harris, Ayers: three key players out of practice or limited with injury.  Three key players, three young guys looking to make the most of their opportunities, three key players with a lot of pride in contract years.

If they’re cleared, they’ll play.  They’ll rest on Monday.  And Ayers just has to be SALIVATING over their tackle situation with Monroe shipped to the Ravens and Joeckel done for the year.

Demaryius Smash

The Broncos LOVE Demaryius Thomas down the left sideline.  Manning’s stat line targeting him outside of the left hash is 12-for-13 for 232 yards and a touchdown. Compound that with abysmal safety play over the top?

Good luck, Alan Ball.

While that remains my favorite match-up, these Jaguars simply don’t have the speed or talent to match-up with any of the Broncos skill positions.

Oh Paul, I’m So Sorry You Signed There, But It Was Your Choice

What do you call one guy making plays on a terrible football team?  A millionaire.  He’s still a multi-multi-millionaire.  Don’t cry for him.

Julius is coming off some epic abuse of a better, faster Penn State linebacker.   I’m sitting here debating on whether or not I should parlay this into a Sandusky joke.  Am I better than that?

The Passion of the Chad

So the defense will eviscerate the Jaguars hapless offense.  In three starts, Gabbert threw one touchdown to a Jaguar (blown assignment on the coverage), and three touchdowns to opposing defenses.  Unfortunately, the worst quarterback the league has ever seen Blaine won’t be playing.

In his stead, the pretty-good-for-a-backup Henne will take the field.  They’ll try to run the football to play keep away from Manning, the healthy-enough Wesley Woodyard lead defense will crush the attempts and force them into 3rd and longs where Chad Henne will try to bubble screen all day (Seriously, be on the lookout for this.  It’s like watching that shit offense McDaniels installed here all over again) and fail.

Fortunately for Chad, he too will ascend after his crucifixion.  While we can obviously expect the score to be so lopsided the Jaguars start throwing regularly in hopes of a Christ-like miracle, we can also expect guys that don’t sniff the field to get some live looks this week.  Both are a recipe for some moderate Henne success.

I expect approximately 20 mostly-garbage-time points from Jacksonville.

Trap Game?

I hated the Jaguars for over a decade after the 1996 playoff upset.  Imagine how Elway feels.

I still hate my last employer and I wasn’t even fired let alone had an entire community turn on me and walk me to the door.  Imagine how Del Rio feels.

I still want to bury my old rivals.  Imagine how Peyton Manning (a guy who had minimal qualms about hanging 41 points on his brother) feels.

Mental Exercise

Close your eyes and picture this (well you can’t close your eyes and read, but you get what I’m going for, right?): 3rd and 10, Denver up by 7, Brady has the ball and is lined up, and he’s staring down a 5 man rush made up of Von, Wolfe, Malik, Ayers and Phillips.

How many of you smiled?  If you didn’t I’ve got some bad news: you’re a filthy Pats fan.

Around the League:

Only Brandon would knowingly incur a fine to raise awareness for his made-up mental disorder.

Is it just me or is NBC getting a little too cheeky with their coverage?

Jimmy Graham is pretty amazing.  Vanilla-chocolate swirl ice cream is pretty amazing.  …Coincidence?

Hester sure looks like a douche for yelling at Gould in the midst of such a shitty performance.

Now that the Colts don’t have to pretend Dwight Freeney is a good player, Mathis is going off in those favorable match-up pass rush opportunities.  With 9.5 sacks through 5 games, Mathis is on pace for a 30.5 sack season.  Plan for week 7 @ Indy?  Max Protect!

The Streak

So Peyton threw his first pick thanks to glare from the terrible stadium position in Dallas… in the middle of ANOTHER FIVE TOUCHDOWN FUCKING GAME.  But MOST importantly, here’s Wile E. Coyote Peyton Manning fooling everyone because, lol, Peyton can’t run.

**If anyone is competent enough with photoshop to put Peyton on a tricycle or a Big Wheel as he casually cruises that score in for 6, please contact me**

Free Money (…and by free, I mean you’re losing with the vig):

Green Bay -3
Detroit -2.5
Houston -7.5
NYJets -1.5
Cincinnati -6.5
New Orleans +2.5
Dallas -5.5
Colts -1.5

Cumulative: 8-8. Pretty awesome that I can peg each aspect of this except for the part that makes money.

That’s Good Broncos

Is it just me or is he just getting better EVERY week?

And because LeSean McCoy’s a dick (scoreboard, douche)

About the Author

Patrick | Other Articles

Patrick Turley was honorably discharged at the rank of Sergeant from the Marine Corps in Nov, 2006 after five years of service. He currently resides with his daughter Taylor in Jacksonville, FL. Patrick discovered his love for writing at an early age, having written his first novella at fourteen years old and continuing to work on his own unique voice. He is currently working on the mystery/thriller genre and returning to Penn State to follow more closely in his father’s footsteps. His free time is split between his daughter, lovely girlfriend, trying to stay active, and taking the NFL entirely too seriously.


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